Immature They say that love has no boundaries and no age. I used to deny this idea since I found it a bit disturbing for older women adapting to the immaturity of younger men, or how older men like the “fresh” feeling of dating younger women who probably haven’t hit their prime. Yet here I am, lost and drowning in a sea of mixed signals of a boy 4-years younger than me. This was never part of my plan, the plan I have created for myself: to date a man my age or ate least 2-3 years older than me, have an amazing, healthy, and blessed relationship, and eventually settle down but no, this didn’t go according to plan.
Who knew I would find myself head-over-heels in love in a span of two weeks over a boy who seemed to have hit his prime in such an early age of 17? Is it probably because I grew up a little less immature, wanting to go out most of the time and have good times rather than read a book at home? He rather we were unexpected, a case of a simple crush led to something bigger and as I thought better. Yet here I am, lost and sleepless wondering what went wrong in a small and shallow argument that led to a week of no-talk, no-show, and probably the end of a 2-month romance.
It saddens me how my friends pointed out that since I’m older, I get to call the shots but along the way, I learned to compromise and understand where he was coming from. Though I think that wasn’t enough, was it? I know that I’m older and I know that compared to him, I have been through so much more and experienced probably a tremendous list of heartaching situations, but if we’re talking compromising, why couldn’t he? If it takes “two to tango” then probably this whole time I have been dancing alone, all alone.
So within this one week of no-show and no-talk, I have reflected and admitted to myself that there is no more “US” or “WE” but “ME” left standing. No more asking myself why or how but I have to start realizing the “NOW.” If he comes back, I’ll just have to be ready if he leaves again, but with what he has shown? The boy I have loves instantly is not coming to me, and that’s a fact that should be accepted with no excuses nor reasons included.
Immature
They say that love has no boundaries and no age. I used to deny this idea since I found it a bit disturbing for older women adapting to the immaturity of younger men, or how older men like the “fresh” feeling of dating younger women who probably haven’t hit their prime. Yet here I am, lost and drowning in a sea of mixed signals of a boy 4-years younger than me. This was never part of my plan, the plan I have created for myself: to date a man my age or ate least 2-3 years older than me, have an amazing, healthy, and blessed relationship, and eventually settle down but no, this didn’t go according to plan.
Who knew I would find myself head-over-heels in love in a span of two weeks over a boy who seemed to have hit his prime in such an early age of 17? Is it probably because I grew up a little less immature, wanting to go out most of the time and have good times rather than read a book at home? He rather we were unexpected, a case of a simple crush led to something bigger and as I thought better. Yet here I am, lost and sleepless wondering what went wrong in a small and shallow argument that led to a week of no-talk, no-show, and probably the end of a 2-month romance.
It saddens me how my friends pointed out that since I’m older, I get to call the shots but along the way, I learned to compromise and understand where he was coming from. Though I think that wasn’t enough, was it? I know that I’m older and I know that compared to him, I have been through so much more and experienced probably a tremendous list of heartaching situations, but if we’re talking compromising, why couldn’t he? If it takes “two to tango” then probably this whole time I have been dancing alone, all alone.
So within this one week of no-show and no-talk, I have reflected and admitted to myself that there is no more “US” or “WE” but “ME” left standing. No more asking myself why or how but I have to start realizing the “NOW.” If he comes back, I’ll just have to be ready if he leaves again, but with what he has shown? The boy I have loves instantly is not coming to me, and that’s a fact that should be accepted with no excuses nor reasons included.
